Today my grandpa passed away~ I'm really confused at the moment.
Because I've some problems to show my feelings to my parents... I though maybe I could lose my story here~
My grandpa and I are just like water and oil. We always starts really well, but ends up with fighting or arguments... I could remember since I was little he always underestimated me...till I was 15 I had it enough. I couldn't stand it anymore! (I think it also had a part to do with my relationship with my parents, because they also made me feel like that I wasn't good enough) Instead of visiting him every weekends... I started just visiting him just on holidays... and from holidays just once tills two times per year... I didn't hate him... I just can't get well with him.. I just don't want to argue anymore... But when he needs me I'll be there for him, but when he doesn't I just don't want to pay any attention to it anymore~
So the months and years passed us by~
When I see him I always greets him, but he couldn't recognize me anymore (but he remembered me)...
He somehow suddenly changed... I still can remember the day that he called me pretty for the first time, while when I was 11 or 13 he always called me fat!
But to be honest... I'm really thank-full for my younger niece!
Because of her I could see my grandpa this year, if it wasn't her... I'll not had a conversation with my grandpa again... I'm really glad that she persuaded me that day, if she didn't I'm not sure or that I'll regret later...
I was really happy that in the end that my grandpa finally acknowledged me. He was proud that I'm working in a pharmacy and he was proud that he knows that I want to study further in healthcare.
I'm really confused at the moment it's because I just don't know how I'm supposed to react... I had a bad relationship with him, but he is my grandpa... I just don't know how to feel~
Yet I'm kinda furious at the moment, because of the way how he left us~ (he actually had a chance to be saved, but the person with him didn't know how to handle so....)
Dear Grandpa, You'll always have a special place in my heart~ And I'll never forget our last memories~ May you rest in peace ~
On February 26 I have celebrated my birthday! I had a great time! My friends and I went to Antwerp to shop and eat. (I love Antwerp Chocolates, Macaroons & Waffles ).
Later in the evening we went to a restaurant ‘Etenstijd’ (means: Dinnertime) The last time that I've been there was 3 years ago, it’s my favorite restaurant! Because it has kind off old fashioned look and it’s always nice and cozy.
(I look so pale compared to my family, lol) And at the end of the day I’ve got some nice presents ^^
- A wellness treatment for 2 persons - A makeup fixation spray (M.A.C.) - SKII eye cream - Chérie Bow Palet (Dior)
I love it all!!
Thank you my Friends & Family! I really appreciate it! Because of you guys my life feels complete!
At first I wish everybody a Happy Valentine's Day!! I kind of like Valentines day, because this is the day were peoples show their love to each other! I like to see peoples trying hard to show that they care of each other. (It's more noticeable at February 14th, that's why I like it) I've saw a guy who was bought a rose and a valentine's card and rushing with his little daughter (it was so cute XD)
While everybody was trying to chase for each other love.. I was chasing for the food that I love I've found my new food addiction: Ladurée
(I'm sooo in love with the green apple macaroon )
And I actually don't really like chocolates, but since I've tried the chocolates of Chocolateline .... I've been addicted to the Apero (green chocolate with rum and passionfruit) and Miss Piggy (Chocolate with bacon, I know it's sounds weird but it's really Yummy!)
Still 5 days to go and it's my birthday again. I can't wait for it! Because Shinee (my favorite band) new album will release on my birthday!
~ For some reason every time when I hear your voice my heart beat faster ~ ~ For you it could means nothing, but for me it could means everything~
Last Christmas I've been celebrated with my text books (because of my final exams) and working @ my father restaurant. I can't believe it's already a year ago ~ Times goes really fast! This Christmas was totally different than last year for me, because I don't have to study and I don't had to work @ my fathers place (because I'm still working full time @ the pharmacy, if I did I think I'll be K.O after Christmas)... Since I was 14 years old I haven't/couldn't celebrate Christmas, because I had to work @ the restaurant... but I was fine with it! Because I was working with my family and I could see all the costumers were happy!
However I didn't had to work or study I didn't celebrated Christmas(yet). All I did was re-watching Naruto (Shippuden)! It's my favorite anime! My favorite character is Sakura Haruno! The reason why I studied medicine was because of that anime! (I know I sound really naive) Before watching it I didn't know what I wanted to do/be when I was grow up. After watching it.. I really admired Sakura.. Of-course! I knew the whole anime is something fiction and I had to be realistic! When I finally started with the study I actually really like it! And I still loving it to work at the pharmacy, because I could help peoples and every day I learn something! Because I'm still young I still want to study more while I've the chance now. So.. in September 2013 I'll go back to school. I think I still want to do something with healthcare, I'm still researching
I haven't blogged for a while, the last time that I've (really) blogged was about 6 month's ago~ The last 6 month's my health was not really good... In May I had a throat infection. So I tried different antibiotics and painkillers to stop the pain. It tokes me 2 weeks to recover. I was glad that I've recovered just in time, because at the first week of June I was going to New York for 2 weeks. (but my heath isn't going very well this year)
My vacation in New York was amazing! I haven't been there for 5 years and I think New York changed a lot.
I couldn't recognize some place anymore... If I had to walk by all by myself than I think that I'll get lost. It felt so great to see my family again! Though... I don't live there anymore, but when I was arrived it feels kind off 'I was finally at home.' The first couple days my aunt was took me to all the places where I used to go with my parents when I was younger. A couple days later my cousins showed me the places that I wanted to see: Madame Tussaud, Central Park & K-Town!
I think NYC is a beautiful city, but after I heard how many hours my cousins had to work per week... I don't think that I can survive in NYC. I've heard that they've to work like 50 -70 hours per week! When I've heard that the first question that I've asked was: Is that legal?! Probably it's normal in the U.S. (@ the pharmacy I'm the only one who works 36 hours per week, while my other colleagues works 16-30 hours per week and they can still complain that they've to work that much...) I really enjoyed in NYC! When I was NYC I was look like a shopaholic X_X Everything was so cheap! The food! The clothes! The make up! Every day I came back with 4-5 bags clothes!
I was actually hoping that NYC was a vacation to take some rest, but in the end it turned out that it wasn't. I haven't slept for 2 weeks! When I was staying over at my aunt place, I've slept on a wooden plank ... It wasn't comfort at all!! And at the first couple days I couldn't get use to the noise. Every night I can hear the ambulance or the police and cars. I couldn't remember all those noise when it was 5 years ago... The last couple days I was exhausted, because lack of sleep. But I still appreciate and cherish the moment that I've spent with my family! The most funniest place that I've been there was: The Big Gay Ice Cream Shop The ice cream there are really delicious I would definitely recommend that place if you're looking for good ice!
I really appreciate and cherish the time that my family spend with me! My cousin told me: You make me feel like a tourist here while you're actually the tourist, because of you I'm going to places where I've never been and I've living here my whole life @ NYC! When I was leaving NYC already, my Grandma almost cried. It felt like my heart was tearing apart to see that. I was really happy to see my family again! I hope that I could go back there soon to see them again
Later in end of October I went with my cousin to Antwerp! I love that city! And Antwerp is definitely the place to get some rest. Everybody there is so friendly! When someone sees you that you're lost, they will help you right away! We've shopped, eat and drink some expensive champagne @ the ChampagneBar
I feel really sorry for the woman and her baby. I just can't understand that the man can call his own wife and baby ugly. I could never imagine that one of my parents don't wants me, because I look ugly. I don't think that his wife was ugly before the surgery, in my eyes she looks fine! Nobody is perfect!
I can understand the fact that the guy felt cheated, because he knows nothing about the plastic surgery, but he was the one who chooses for her. He was the one who married her. And he was the one who didn't research her backgrounds well before marrying her. I think it's his own fault. I can't believe that the judge is awarding him for $120.000. (Yet, I can't say that his wife hasn't did anything wrong, I think she had to be honest in her relationship to begin with.)
Since when was being ugly a crime?! Since when was wanting to be (more) beautiful illegal?!
I can understand why peoples now days having/ wanting for plastic surgery. It's because of the media/ peoples get bullied of their looks/ low self esteem or obsession.
When I was younger I've got bullied about my looks too. I know how the pressure feel when you don't have "the looks/style". Just 2 years ago I've been changed a lot, because of my past I've started to lose weight, using make up and changed my clothing style. When my parents saw that I was putting pretty much afford in it, they've told me: No matter how beautiful you want to be, there's always people out there who are more beautiful than you, and there's always peoples who are less beautiful than you, so why are you putting so much effort in it? I know that my parents are right!